Tag Archives: blood

I’m not worthy of you, I’m not

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focus

if only i could rupture my ribs
if only i could swallow the glass shards
if only i could cringe my pallid eyelids to leave out
blood, bereavement and flaws
to get away from ‘nobody’
to surpass my past
to get into
focus

*I’ve been very lousy when it came to blogging the last year. I’m not completely taking up the blame on me as I have enough things keeping me busy. A new year, a new start. Hoping to be more frequent and better with all the poetry and writing.

Happy reading! 🙂 Feel free to opine and share *

if i’m let

over the crumbled glass
veiled on the sidewalk
striding
my constrained steps i count within
narrow time frame
under cotton-like
golden threaded shreds
wanting to be concealed amidst fragile beauty
untouched
to find the self elsewhere
blooming, cringing
clasped above mediocre
if i’m let-
to be lost, misled
to step on the glass
and lose a drop of blood

 

Featured Image Location: Bombay (now known as Mumbai)
 Photographed by my friend.

 

 

if he could

spreading venomous fluid through my already frail
aged veins
brutal secret demons in me
scream
stunned I stood
savage inside mine
blackened skull
cut through his guts
to break scanty
expressions
cold blood flows down the blood-red roses
admiring the lethal
i still stand
unanswered will it be
his door half doomed
evil in me should slow down
but
half-open door should never shut for i can’t breathe his alluring venom
anymore
i need to survive composedly
in chaos that
i designed
he will appear if
he could

Beyond The Bounds, I’m

Fire cannot see the ashes it creates, I scrutinized, lying in one corner of the dark room, possibly the darkest.I prefer.

Barring the randomly rumbling thoughts in my mind, I tried to peruse the situation.
I don’t belong to this place. I belong to the distant cedars. Under those evergreen woods, etched is my name.  That is the place where the dead meets evil, blood meets peace and fire meets ashes.
I want to lie there, blamed by none, feeling my numbness rise— touching its peak. Amid the sap green smoke, it is beautiful, to see me there like a creeper— twining the stupefied me, relishing my soul. I finally produced what it wants, it deserves. I can’t take you there, for you don’t know how to hum with me, you rattle. And that does no good to the cedars. It’s darker than a blind man’s world. You will extol the beauty, never. I breathe to drag in the grand fragrance, I apologize. As you fail to feel this intense fancy.

A hundred souls with me there, selfless, lie. Every nerve brims with bliss. The deceptive never survived the chill— iceberg cuts through your gut, distorting your spine. Surrendering is the only choice, I did. The loyal ones do.
It’s for the toughest.
Go away.
Beyond the bounds, I’m.

i’m not

i sat near the hen’s coop
trying hard, to understand Newton
for the test next day
waited, for the night to pass
it seemed stagnant
it tested my patience

my mind occupied with guilt
i was sorry, had to convey somehow
to the tall, slim boy, my friend
we fought; so silly of me, i thought
as i put aside Newton’s theory
 just wanted to go to school

awkwardness crept in
as i sat near him
i was scared to kick start
eye contact was a distant possibility
my heart thudded
dumbness invaded me, i thought

if i don’t speak, guilt will hang on
even after my death
because intense was my fault
opened my mouth, so
to speak up ‘hey’
but! something else spoke

strangers entered,
with weapons i’ve just heard of
they aimed at one, then one more, then another
as if their thirst is never ending
shot the pure ones with no mercy
yes! the guns spoke

i cringed under my bench
watching my classmates’ blood drip
i felt a sudden chill
when my friend grabbed my hand
i thought he bent down to hide
i was a fool, i realised

his blood was flowing down my pant.
his eyes met mine
for the last
i whispered “i love you, you’re mine, don’t leave me”
this is much more than a sorry
but he can’t listen
respond
i’m not a happy survivor
i’m not